Monday Morning Glory: I told you Sam Darnold was trash

I told you!

Didn’t I say that shit?

Didn’t I tell you niggas Sam Darnold was trash?

I’ve been saying it since his very first game at USC, a loss to Utah which ironically became his only loss that season. He set school passing records that season and led the Trojans to a miraculous win over Penn State in one of the wildest Rose Bowl games of all-time. Darnold was immediately pegged as a Heisman favorite for 2017 and a surefire first-round pick in the 2018 NFL Draft. However, while the country was busy hugging Sam Darnold’s jock strap, I tried to warn you…

“He’s just another USC quarterback,” I said.

How many times have y’all fell for the great jig in the sky before? Carson Palmer put together a solid career, but THAT is the benchmark for Trojan QBs in the league in the modern era. Matt Leinart had the hype of John Henry’s hammer but never lived up to it in Arizona. In fact, his backup, Matt Cassell, who threw all of 33 passes in four years of college, went onto have a more successful pro career than the former Heisman did.

Mark Sanchez made it to back-to-back AFC Championship games, but the highlight of his NFL days was the butt fumble.

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John David Booty won a couple of Rose Bowl’s but with a name like JOHN DAVID BOOTY it was clear NFL success wasn’t in his future... Matt Barkley somehow is still on an NFL roster while owners, execs and media members alike are still lying to themselves about Colin Kaepernick… and Cody Kessler is…. Cody Kessler.

Simply put, the track record of success for USC quarterbacks in the pros is not that high, but regardless Darnold was expected to go first in the draft. The Browns shockingly knew better, that’s why they went with Baker Mayfield. Saquon Barkley to the Giants, no matter how bad Eli Manning is, was a slam dunk for the one true team of New York, but of course, that other team paying rent at Metlife couldn’t keep from making the same mistake.

You’d think the Jets would learn from past experiences, seeing that they traded up to draft Mark Sanchez nine years earlier. But nope… insanity reared its ugly green head again as they traded up and selected Darnold in April’s draft. A turnover-prone quarterback being stuck under the bright New York City lights in year one with unreal expectations of leading a franchise that hasn’t made the playoffs in eight years? What could go wrong?

Despite throwing a pick-six on his first NFL pass, Darnold shined in his NFL debut in Detroit. Since then, the Jets have gone 2-6, and Darnold is regressing badly. He’s eclipsed 200 yards passing in just three of his last seven games, has four multi-pick games this season (a league-high 14 in total), and has led the Jets to only 33 points in the last three games. He’s having a hard time reading pro defenses too, as evident here in whatever the fuck kind of pass that was..

The Jets were the worst possible environment for Darnold, and his continued regression could cost head coach Todd Bowles his job soon. Another coach could come around and save him, but in a city like New York that crowned him before his scepter was made, the damage could already be done.

Sam Darnold might end up being the best USC QB to hit the league since Palmer, but after Sunday’s FOUR-INTERCEPTION performance, I’m gonna take my victory lap, smoke my cigar and pour some henn dawg as I gloat and accept your apologies.

Maybe you’ll listen to me next time I call a quarterback trash.

QUICK HITS

LEONARD FLOYD FINALLY DID SOMETHING! IT’S ABOUT FUCKING TIME!

Honestly this was all Kyle Fuller. All Floyd needed to do was not drop the ball and get tripped up, but at least he’s on the stat sheet. Also… funny to see Leonard Floyd has scored more touchdowns in his career than “healthy scratch” Kevin White.

The Saints took down the last undefeated Sunday, beating the Rams in a Superdome shootout. I don’t care if we get this game in LA or New Orleans… Roger Goodell better get on his David Stern, make some calls, and make sure we get this game in January.

Michael Thomas is a bonafide top 5 receiver in the league. If that wasn’t clear before, it certainly is after he paid homage to the O.G. Pope Joe Horn with the flip phone celebration in the endzone to seal the game.

Double the points for the Snoop shirt in the postgame presser.

Since we’re staying in Louisiana, let’s shine a spotlight on those losers from Baton Rouge.

LSU, welcome to your tape.

ESPN spent the better part of the last week hyping the shit out of the big clash between #1 Alabama and #3 LSU. There was that wonderful promo about Tua’s greatness, and how he hasn’t seen an atmosphere quite like Death Valley. There was College Gameday and Alex Bregman’s proclamation that Tua wouldn’t even be in the game in the second half cause the Tigers were gonna blow em out!

Then there was pregame… the world fell in awe at the Fehoko family and their Haka. Man white people love making shit their own…

…and then there was Odell, happy as a clam he doesn’t have to run routes for Eli Manning this week.

Death Valley was HYPE! The world was HYPE! THIS was the year LSU finally takes down the mighty Crimson Tide!

LOL.

29-0. At the crib. Don’t ever tell me another goddamn thing about LSU. They are the OKC Thunder of college football… the hype seems fun to buy into early, but in the end they’ll always leave you unsatisfied like this poor girl.